Chemo is over!

I'm done I'm done I'm done I'm done I'm done I'm done I'm done

YAY!!! Here I am with my faithful Rebecca who is driven me all over the place during this chemo time and knit me this warm hat and sat with me the whole day today on my last drip, and my faithful friend Mona who came by to hang out for the end and has made me many cups of tea. Thank you to everyone is helped me with this poisonous part of my year. I cannot name you all (well I could maybe) but I know you and thank you.

My friend Susan P. sent me the most beautiful poem yesterday called "Trouble Deaf Heaven" Sonnet 29, by Bin Ramke, where he structures the poem by asking simple sounding questions, and then answering them with very creative answers. I posted this on Facebook and you can also look it up on the Poetry Foundation website if you're interested. Right now I'm going to use his idea as inspiration and try to compose a little poetic question-and-answer thing of my own, although I'm sure it will not be anywhere near as good as his:

WHAT?

What is today? Today is the end of six events of three drugs pumped into my heart through a spike. Today is a day on the calendar that I longed for like a holiday. A holy day.

What is the end? Maybe everything is a circle and there is no end. Maybe the end of the universe folds back on itself and it's on your desk at work next to a pencil. Maybe it's your bathrobe tie as it dips into the dishwater.

Where is my life? My life exists in my mind and the minds of my friends, and in some digital ink. It's also inside of a cube and outside of the cube.

What is the child in my bed? She is a manifestation of spritelyness and leprechaun Lucky charm, a baby woman I adore. She is always welcome here.

What are the steps? They are a way to go up and down.

When do I start? I started in Africa hundred of thousands of years ago.

What is going on in the corner? The chair is turned sideways so that it faces a wooden piece of furniture uncomfortably. Behind it the corner is empty. It's a place for me to stare.

Where do I lie? I lie upon the couch and I lie upon occasion to save someone's feelings or to protect myself.

Who are the people? They are the friends that sustained me and have sustained me recently and have liked me and loved me and I like them and love them and thank them.

Why are dogs roaming around? They think they're in charge of the earth and they're loping, but they're not wolves and have forgotten how to live. It's not all our fault, it's nature.

Where is the beginning? The beginning was in a stream with electricity.

What are the atoms? They are the bits of the universe, the strings, the violin concertos of all existence and they make up couches and begniets and Georges and stars and the Mona Lisa and nuclear bombs and breasts and and violins and terrorists and tangerines and cancer and babies and toasted BLTs and vaginas and yaks and Antartica and socks and mud and jellyfish and your toaster and toenails and Paris Hilton and shit and French cheeses and AK47s and ottomans and nurses and Vladimir Putin and blow dryers and clouds and Venus and you.

Where will we be? Back in Africa I think - in a few thousand years that'll be the hub the hubbub, the power again.

What is the dream? To get back to a day.

When will I know? When it's today.

What is today? Today is the beginning and the end. I rest.